Days 5-8

over the past 8 days ALL awesome had been removed from my relationship and i couldn't really find any more inside me to put forward.  all i could find was a lot of anger and blame.  neither of those were very productive and honestly the most absurd, horrible, degrading, disrespectful argument i have ever had happened in the middle of the road in a foreign country. the amount of lines that were not just crossed but pole vaulted over were incredible.  shockingly we managed to come back from that on day 7 and the relationship was slightly re-invigorated.   but i am not sure where it left me.   i have to learn how to 1) maintain my own awesome so that i am not drained and broken just because the relationship is. 2) i must remember to replenish the awesome in the relationship when i can but also acknowledge when my SO is trying to replenish it as well. 3) don't be an awesome vampire.  in other words, don't drain him (or the relationship, or anyone) when i am feeling depleted.